LOL. Let me share something. I first got hooked on figure skating in 1988, the Calgary Olympics. Within the space of a week, I'd come to understand on a visceral level, the meaning of that lovely phrase, "The thrill of victory, the agony of defeat." First there was Brian Boitano's simply splendid victory in the men's competition. It was the kind of long program every skater must dream of: clean, strong, self-assured, beautiful to watch, emotionally transcendent. Later, Boitano said that on the one night he had to be magical, it happened.

One week later, his teammate Debi Thomas stumbled and staggered her way through a lackluster long program. I was crushed, though in hindsight, at least she snagged the bronze medal. Interviewed many years later, she admitted that she has basically blocked the event from her mind. She said she cried every day for a month afterwards. And I loved Debi for a lot of the same reasons I love Johnny: she was smart, irreverent, and funny. I felt a particular identification with her because I was her age at the time, also a college student, and I really admired that she was balancing a college workload with elite level figure skating.

I really should've learned my lesson then. But no, I had to keep watching the sport. And there've been some wonderful moments: Kristi Yamaguchi winning the gold in 1992, Paul Wylie winning the silver. The American women going 1-2-3 at Worlds in 1991. Michelle Kwan doing just about everything. The surprise victory of Sarah Hughes in 2002, and Tim Goebel taking the bronze. Pretty much everything Ilya Kulik and Alexi Yagudin did. Johnny's first national title in 2004. So many wonderful performances, it's hard to keep track of them all.

But then there were the times my favorites broke my heart or just failed to live up to their potential. Jill Trenary tanking her Worlds long program in 1989. Kristi missing the National title in 1991. Nancy Kerrigan wiping out at 1993 Worlds. Scott Davis tanking at 1994 Olympics. Nicole Bobeck messing up one competition after another. Michelle inexplicably losing the gold at 1998 Olympics. Kurt Browning not winning a single Olympic medal. Johnny being injured at Worlds last year. The list goes on and on and on.

What I've learned is just to have perspective. It's impossible not to have favorites. I've tried, but it's human nature to lose your heart over something, and there are some skaters who, for whatever reason, just capture your love. They're different, they're special. And so it hurts like hell when they mess up or the fates throw them a cruel roadblock: illness, injury, a missed bus, a bad case of nerves on the one night they really needed to shine.

Let yourself feel the pain, but don't wallow in it. Then put it behind you and get on with things. Spend time with your friends. Watch a funny sitcom or movie. Go outside and get some exercise. Hug your dog. This isn't the end of the world, really. It might feel like it now. Trust me--I've got scars on my skating fan's hide that will never go away. But the wounds stop hurting so much, and sooner or later, the better times will shine more brightly in your memory, while the painful ones fade. It just takes time. Trust me: I've been there. :)

Hugs to all,
--EAW :heart